Spousal Sex Drive
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Posted:Nov 13, 2008 8:26 pm
Last Updated:May 5, 2024 12:51 am
4578 Views
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By and large, I'm a happily married guy. My wife is very attractive, smart as can be and is a great mother to our , for which I am highly fortunate and appreciative. Unfortunately, she is simply not a sexual being and never has been. She freely admits it and doesn't blame it on me or excessive guilt or pressure coming from me. I have tried to bring her around any way I could possibly think of over the years, from sex toys to candlelight dinners, from expensive gifts to a tongue up her ass, but no dice. As annoying and frustrating as it sometimes might become, I would never dream of leaving her as a result of my respect for her as well as my reverence for my . I have relieved my "DSB" (deadly seminal backup) via frequent late night wanking (which i plan on doing momentarily), periodic visits to hookers or massage parlors, and even on one occasion to the private gloryhole of a very kinky local lady who gave me a memorable blowjob. I had previously assumed this to be the usual male sexual libido, but I have been surprised to encounter married ladies on this site who share my woes. I am ever the optimist and hope that some switch will click on with her at some point, but i maintain reasonable expectations. Until then, I will continue on my quest for casual online relationships and periodic no-strings attached hookups. While some of you may not agree with this moral compass of mine, it has relieved some of the stress from an otherwise satisfying relationship.
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Recession Flu?
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Posted:Nov 6, 2008 10:30 pm
Last Updated:Nov 8, 2008 10:34 pm
4638 Views
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I've unfortunately discovered that the recent credit crunch and recession of drained me of much of my energy and sex drive - a limp economy has led to a limp dick I suppose. It has been difficult to see my savings disappear, the value of my home plummet, my friends and lose jobs or regularly worry about how to keep their heads above water, etc. Call it yuppie malaise if you will- i don't really give a shit. Economic and occupational stress and uncertainty have a profound impact on mood and general outlook on life. I suppose these doldrums could be cured by a reversal of an opening of the credit markets and/or a really good blowjob!!!
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One more try
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Posted:Nov 1, 2008 9:41 pm
Last Updated:Sep 27, 2012 7:38 pm
4457 Views
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I've been on hiatus from a paid membership on this site for a number of months now, and I'm wondering whether it's worth the time and effort to pursue something, anything, on this site. I have spent time in the past trying to come up with some fairly witty blog posts, to little avail. I have attempted to make some meaningful relationships on the site as well, and all I have to speak for it over the past 3 years is one fairly freaky encounter. Is ther any hope for an exceedingly normal (albeit married) guy playing solo out here or should I look elsewhere??? Enquiring minds want to know!
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Pube trimming
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Posted:Dec 12, 2005 10:53 pm
Last Updated:Nov 13, 2008 8:04 pm
4430 Views
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I've decided to try blogging again, even though I've grown a bit disheartened over the lack of viewers of my other posts and my near absence of commentary, either to the blog posting or to my account mailbox.
A couple of weeks ago, I got to thinking of the hypocricy of expecting a woman to have a nicely trimmed pubis but that I was somehow exempt from the obligation. I have never given myself a "shave and a haircut" down there and frankly have never even thought of doing so. The hair on my crotch had gotten quite dense, there was a decent amount of pubic hair poking through my briefs towards my thighs and the hair on my balls had grown a bit out of sight (looked a bit like Yoda's head!). It is a treat getting orally serviced by my spouse, but I'm sure she prefers actual floss for her teeth and not stray pubic hairs. Pretty picture, huh?
Anyway, late one evening, I grabbed a cuticle scissors and safety razor and significantly trimmed the hair around my johnson and shaved nearly all of the hair from my balls. After an initial bit of itchiness, it felt and looked great, and by shaving the hair near the base of my cock, when erect it looked an inch or so longer. Take a look at my recently posted picture on my profile - still plenty of hair left - it simply looks a bit less like a bird's nest or Dr. J's old afro.
To all of the girls reading this message who I've had the pleasure of being intimate with, I apologize for the jungle that was between my legs. Not ready for a male bikini wax just yet (particularly after seeing "The 40 Year-Old Virgin"), and am not ready to advocate a total mowing of the lawn, just a bit of pruning of the shrub to keep it looking neat and nice.
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Back for More
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Posted:Nov 8, 2005 8:58 pm
Last Updated:Aug 2, 2008 10:21 pm
4346 Views
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This blog thing is pretty cathartic. I mean, over the past 22 hours, I've actually had 13 people review my blog. Granted, some of these may have had something to do with accidentally clicking my hyperlink. Perhaps it was my witty headline. I know that one person actually ready and enjoyed the damned thing, so there was at least some affirmation.
I'm still a bit of a neophyte to this whole site, and not sure I get it. Seems like most of the postings to the site consist of pictures of erect cocks and women's gynecological shots. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I'm not going to select a partner, for a quickie or otherwise, based merely on what her pussy looks like. To satisfy those of you who are solely concerned with base physical appearances, I've decided to attach a picture of my "huge cock".
Perhaps the way to truly be noticed on this site is to do something truly different - perhaps a picture of my pecker in its most shriveled-up and smallest state, perhaps after I get out of the shower or something. Speak up, ladies - perhaps there are some of you out there who want nothing more than to get a gander of my "cold, soft cock" or "tight, leathery sac".
Oops. Just noticed a pubic hair on the keyboard. Better dispose of that evidence before my wife and get back online.
Time to get back to work. Brought some files home from the office this evening - guess I'm jerking off my instead of myself this evening!
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Hello - any sign of life out there?
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Posted:Nov 7, 2005 10:36 pm
Last Updated:Nov 10, 2008 9:36 pm
4375 Views
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Greetings. Why do you give a shit about what i have to say? Perhaps you don't, which would be your loss.
I am a seemingly normal 40 year old lawyer, with a sizable salary, an attractive wife, great , a beautiful home and absolutely no sex life. I ask for neither your commendation or your pity.
I knew when I got married nearly 15 years ago that I would be able to lead this sort of life of comfort and privilege at the expense of an active love life. It hasn't been for lack of trying - I simply married a partner who is a truly good person and who makes me a significantly better human being, but is simply disinterested in fucking around with me. While this is an ongoing frustration, I've come to accept it to some extent. Trust me, I've tried damn near everything to bring her around, but putting on the Barry White albums, watching porn, and wearing a thong just ain't gonna do it here.
I have tried any number of different ways to quench my seemingly endless search for kink and sexual satisfaction without jeopardizing my relationship with my wife and family - wanking to internet porn (thank God for intenet porn!), lap dances at strip clubs, asian massage parlors, visits, occasional gloryhole blowjobs received at the adult video store (though i don't really consider myself bi), and even a couple of (disappointing) visits to swing clubs as a single male.
I am new to Xmatch and question whether there is a legitimate opportunity for a truly normal, non-psychopathic person like me to locate my female equivalent (perhaps a sexually repressed stay-at-home "MILF" looking for some kinky fun during lunch time while junior is at school). While I'm ordinarily an optimist by nature, I'm also a realist, and understand that the vast majority of guys out there are creepy and/or full of shit, so I hold out little hope of finding my needle in the haystack. If nothing more, I'd at least like some opportunity to know that at least that people are reading this blog and have at least some pedestrian interest in what the hell I have to say. I can direct the contact of this blog in any direction you wish me to, be it a discussion of my life story, relationships, perversions/fantasies, ambitions, etc. I can make it serious and introspective or topical and humorous (which I greatly prefer).
Time for me to move on to more immediately gratifying pursuits. It's 1:30 AM and I have a severe case of "deadly seminal backup" requiring a few minutes of one-handed internet surfing. Ah, perhaps tonight's theme will be asian pornstars (love that Kaylani). G'night all. Joe
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To link to this blog (JosephShmoe) use [blog JosephShmoe] in your messages.
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